The Elevator Pitch

*ding*
I sighed. The elevator doors slid open, interrupting my solitude. A young man stepped into the elevator, carrying a briefcase loaded with papers.
“Evening. Headed to the Lobby?” I asked, hoping against hope.
“No, third floor please.” He responded hurriedly, not even looking up while he fidgeted his briefcase closed. Better than nothing I thought. Seven floors of company is still better than eleven. As I pressed the button he finally managed to zip the case shut.
“Thanks.” He said, looking up and smiling. Suddenly his face froze. Crap.
“Holy Shit! You’re Stephen Spielberg! Ohmygod. My name is Stephen Dickson. I’m a Huge fan!”
“Nice to meet you.” I knew what was coming next. I’d been through this three times this week already. I glanced at the floor dial, the doors were only just now closing.
“Now I’m sure you have heard this before but I have the perfect idea for a western!”
Not again. “Well, I-”
“It’s 1899, New Mexico. The town is Carlsbad.”

*ding* Ninth floor past. Please don’t let it stop.

“The Main Character is Arvid Macenion, he’s a skilled drifter/Martial Artist and he’s Immortal!”
“Well-”
“The story is a Whirlwind action/adventure/mystery with a touch of romance.

*ding* Seventh Floor. Do they Make slower elevators?
“A group of evil men from the east are taking over the country around Carlsbad, supposedly prospecting for gold.”
“I-”
“But what they are Really after is an ancient Navaho Magical circle located in the Carlsbad Caves.

*ding* Fifth Floor. Almost there…

“It only activates at the start of each century and can be used to take over the world!”
“But-”
“And the Hero Arvid has to stop them! The title is Carlsbad Dangerous. And-

*ding* Third floor. Finally! But as the doors slid open however, Stephen just kept talking!

“For the part of-”
“Sir-”
“Arvid I-”
“Sir.”
“-think that-”
“Sir!” Finally he halted, blinking in surprise. “Isn’t this your floor?” I asked, struggling to keep the exasperation out of my voice.
“Oh.” He said, glancing about. “Yeah, I guess it is.”
“I expect so.” I said dryly. The number on the Dial aught to show you that.
“Well, I should go…”
“Please.”
“Well, here is my business card.” He fumbled with his briefcase and pulled out a small, unremarkable white card, pushing it eagerly into my hands.
“I’m… In a bit of a hurry here…” I murmured. Must be civil, must be patient.
“Oh right! Right.” He stood there for a moment, bemused. “Well. My number is on the-”
“Business card. Yes. I got it here.”
“Right. Well…” He looked crestfallen. Probably just realizing how likely his chances were. “It was nice meeting you.”
“Pleasure.” I spoke evenly. C’mon, you are a foot from the doors.
“Well… When you-”
“I’m sure you have better things to do…”
“Yes. Sorry.” He stepped back, finally letting the doors close. "Bye!”
Thank god! I dropped the business card to the floor and straightened my collar as the elevator began to descend. Worst 30 seconds ever.

*ding* The elevator slowed to a stop at the second floor. Guess my celebration was a little premature.

The doors slid open to admit a tall, well muscled man with short, black hair. His clothes struck me as odd, composed of a white silken jacket, belted over similarly colored white pants. A red embroidered leather vest finished the look. Thoroughly bemused, I nodded back as he stepped in and pressed the second floor button.

As the doors closed he turned to me, smiling. “Stephen Spielberg right? He shook my hand warmly. “I remember your first little film. What was it called…” He looked up and stroked his chin thoughtfully.
“Um…”
He snapped his fingers, issuing a sharp crack, startling me. “The Last Gunfight. The nice little 8 mm you made back in 1958. I always thought you would make if far. Congratulations.”
“I…”

*ding* The elevator doors opened and the stranger strolled out.

“Wait!” He turned back, smiling coolly as before. “I didn’t get your name.”
“Oh, my apologies.” he grinned. The elevator doors started sliding closed. “The name is Arvid Macenion. Glad to have met you.”
For a good five seconds I stared at the closed door, the smooth elevator again dropping towards the lobby. As the elevator slid to a halt I bent over and picked up the business card. Never a bad idea to hold onto a business card I thought. At least this time.